I'm of Two Minds. No, I'm not. Yes, I am.

Halloween is a mixed bag for me. On the one hand, I'm fully in favor of bite-sized candy and anything that irks the Tight-Lipped Religious Fanatics. On the other hand, I've already had far too much of being scared, startled, and surprised.

I intellectually understand how some people enjoy being scared, startled, or surprised. But I personally don't. As the Incident in the Fun House showed, others don't enjoy me being startled either. I have always heard stories about how my grandma awakens my grandpa by standing in the doorway and calling his name because if touched while sleeping he wakes up swinging. I'm ashamed to say that I'd always attributed it to a quirk; I know realize that it's a symptom of his childhood.

As I drive around I see many “haunted houses” being erected. There are a lot of things that others enjoy and I don't that I can be happy for them enjoying. But to me going through one of these would be tantamount to torture.

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