Hearts and Minds

A meme from from mentioned A movie you saw on a last date. I actually could answer that question.

In my sophomore year in college I was dating a townie. Let's call her "Heather" since that is her real name. My critical error is that I mistook "streetwise" for "mature". After a few months, she decided that she wanted to break up with me. Rather than the obvious course of just telling me that she no longer wanted to date, she devised the ever-so-curious plan of making me so miserable that I would break up with her. To ensure complete efficacy, she brought her friend along to double the misery. Not being privy to her brilliant plan, I invited a friend along as an escort for her friend.

By coincidence, we went to see Good Morning, Vietnam. Now, it is a fine film and has some downright hilarious moments in it, moments that, sadly, were lost on me. Of course, Good Morning, Vietnam also has some melancholy moments that seemed all the more poignant. I always think of Heather when I think of Good Morning, Vietnam but other than that I have no problem with the film.

Another part of her cunning scheme was for her friend to be extremely annoying. Her friend, also quite the brain trust, decided that playing the same song over and over again for an hour would do the trick. Only very recently have I been able to again listen to U2's With or Without You.

The really ironic thing about it is that her plan did not work. Just as I did not recognize her immaturity, she did not recognize my Scottish stubbornness. Me? Let a trifle like misery get in the way? Pshaw. She had no idea of the kind of misery to which I was accustomed. Finally, my tenacious perseverance wore her down and she broke the news to me.

Ha! I laugh at your puny attacks. Your Whirlwind of Misery attack is no match for my Wall of Dissociation defense!


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